Why the Halcyon (Can this be my grown-up Xanga?)

OK-- I freely admit that I liked the days of Xanga, and I wish it was still cool. It is so fascinating to peek inside your friends' heads to see what is rattling around in there. I feel honored when people have the guts to put something real out there and trust me enough to let me read it. Lately, though, I haven't been brave enough to do any of that myself.

Writing is freaking hard, but words have to be seen, or at least have the chance of being seen, to be alive. I think the threat of someone else's eyes has a magic effect on the words we end up choosing. They suddenly mean more. They're our fingerprints.

So, in short, I'm starting this thing. It's more for my own use than anything else, so please don't think I'm vain. It's been years (lord!) since I've actually been required to write anything, so I'm way out of practice. But I'm tired of pretending I don't care about words. I want to know more about this life I'm living, and this seems like a decent way to go about discovering it. That sounds like a selfish reason to start a blog, but I'm going to give it a go anyways.

I love the ancient halcyon legend-- a bird rumored to build its nest on the open sea, with the power to calm wind and waves. Time holds its breath while the halcyon guards its home. Happy times, bright and golden, defiant of threatening storms. 

Not from successful love alone,
Nor wealth, nor honor'd middle age, nor victories of politics or war;
But as life wanes, and all the turbulent passions calm,
As gorgeous, vapory, silent hues cover the evening sky,
As softness, fulness, rest, suffuse the frame, like freshier, balmier air,
As the days take on a mellower light, and the apple at last hangs
really finish'd and indolent-ripe on the tree,
Then for the teeming quietest, happiest days of all!
The brooding and blissful halcyon days!

-Walt Whitman