No, actually, I'm not that busy.

With few things demanding our presence during the week and not much extra money to spend on things anyway, the pace of life is decidedly slow. Every commitment, at this point, is really a choice. The boys and I can spend an hour getting a $6 car wash, or make a whole morning out of making chalk soup and listening to free audiobooks. A trip to the donut store could equal an entire day's events. I actually do have time to make homemade pizza dough on any given night, or have a long talk on the phone, or just go to bed early. 

As much as it embarrasses me to say it, I'm really not that busy. 

And see, I almost added "most of the time" to the end of that sentence, instinctually. It's just what we say now. Life is busy. Crazy. We are in demand, and our schedules are always full of interesting, meaningful or important tasks. 

Why do I feel like a weirdo by admitting that I'm really not that busy?! 

Am I the only one who finds herself slightly exaggerating her busy-ness in order to fit in?

I'm learning that it's okay to admit we have space in the margins of life. As my wise friend Penny once said, you learn to sit with yourself, which is surprisingly hard to do. 

Here is my resolution to stop hiding behind busy-ness, and to admit that I do have plenty of time for things that are valuable. I'm resolving to honor people by letting them know I don't have to pencil them in, and that I genuinely look forward to spending time together with no rush and no agenda.